When The Shock Subsides

[Guest]

Tires screeched as a car sped through the streets. The driver was a woman with long blue hair, and there was a man with purple hair laying in the back, unconscious. At a distance, it could have seemed that she was kidnapping him, but no. The two had a more dramatic connection, one that took them back to a series of screams, running, blood, and back-and-forth saving. In fact, it was only through this panic that the girl was able to take such drastic action. Her feet were bare, but she continued to speed through the streets of Central City, making sharp turns and navigating through the city without any real destination in mind. It wasn't until her feet became too sore that she pulled over to the curb.

A sob escaped as Millie turned around and looked at the man she had kidnapped, and with his own car, no less! She nudged him to see if he was alright. Even though she should have taken him to a hospital, she was in so much of a panic that she just wanted to get out of there. She had driven until midnight, and probably in circles. After nudging him once more, she turned to face the front again. The images of burning bodies, flaming tents and blood hitting the asphalt were going through her mind, and she began to cry, placing her forehead on the steering wheel. Her sobs were pained and her feet rubbed raw from the pedals. The rubber band in her hair had come loose, and her long, blue hair clung to her back as though trying to comfort her.

"This...it's all my fault," she wailed, bringing her forehead up and slamming it onto the wheel. The car horn sounded, but she didn't budge. Her bangs clung to her forehead as tears ran down the sides of the wheel and onto her lap. If it wasn't for her, he wouldn't have had to save her, and he wouldn't have... "So many people...burning...so many flames...I'm so sorry," the girl cried. The initial shock from the situation had worn off completely, and she just hugged the wheel and cried. It was as though she was crying her heart out to mourn all of the unfortunate citizens who fell victim to that dreadful incident, to apologize to the heavens for the violence that occurred. Milleise dug her nails into the leather of the steering wheel and pulled her legs to herself. Her feet were so raw that they had started to bleed, but what did it matter? The girl's entire body trembled, and she felt hot from all of the breaths that she released between sobs.

"So many of them...so many people...dead," she cried, her words muffled by the wheel.

[Guest]

Cold fingers touched her cheek from the back seat. Having silently awoken with his bloodied gloves removed, the purple-haired man blindly reached out into the darkness without thinking. He withdrew his hand wet and stared at it blankly in confusion. All he could do was think about how much the loud blasting of the horn hurt his head and made his eardrums feel like they were bursting. "You're going to kill me with that obnoxious beeping..." Zairen's head was swimming. It was all he could do to continue holding himself upright. He crawled up to the passenger's seat and collapsed into a heap. Closing his eyes, he let out a pained sigh, lungs rattling slightly. His breathing did not sound good. There was no energy left for anything. The chimera didn't care where they were going or even who he was with. Everything was a blur. He just knew that the person driving was crying. If he didn't do something other than sit there and feel like he was dying, the emotional pain would continue and they would get nowhere.

Zairen pried open a single blue eye and waited for it to adjust to the darkness. He focused blurry sight on the girl and noticed that it was none other than bread-face. How...strangely interesting. She must have picked him up off the ground? Who would have done that in a situation like that? An amused expression came over his face and he leaned in closer to her. "Hey you, bread-face. Hey..." He poked her in the cheek where the band aid should have been and then opened his other eye, staring at her while trying to ignore the fire burning in his chest. "Drive somewhere before I pass out on you." He touched his forehead, which felt like an iron and shut his eyes. Ugh it hurt. He couldn't even see straight. He let himself slide back into his seat and rested his head against the cool leather. "Not the hospital," he breathed, "I'm a chimera; there's a reason for this. ...And turn the A/C on... ...Please."

[Guest]

A chill went down the girl's spine as she felt a hand touch her cheek, and her shoulders tensed, but she did not sit up quickly. In fact, she held on to the wheel with her monstrous grip for a while longer as the purple-haired man spoke, complaining about the car horn. Only then did she lightly lift her face off of the leather wheel, which had become wet with her tears. She cast a glance toward the passenger seat as the man moved into it, and swallowed hard as she listened to his breathing. It sounded worse than she could have imagined, but freaking out definitely wouldn't help the situation any. Milleise kept her grip on the wheel and stared straight ahead as she felt him poke her cheek. She wiped her eyes and let out a short, unstable laugh and looked over at him at his "bread-face" comment. Well, it's not like he knew her name, and she didn't know his, either.

He wanted her to take him somewhere that wasn't the hospital, but she thought that would have been the best place to go. Until he explained that he was a chimera, at least. The girl blinked. If she remembered correctly, the previous (and first) chimera she'd met didn't look human at all, really. She smiled at the thought that there were still a lot of things to be learned about the world, mentally noting that alchemy was one of them. Not that she cared to delve into the craft herself. Turning the air on, she looked out her window before turning back to him with swollen eyes.

"My name...it's Milleise Notbeka." the girl stated bluntly before beginning to drive away from the curb. She would drive to her own, personal residence. It was the only place she could think of to take him, to be honest, but she didn't particularly mind. Miraculously, it was only a few minutes away. She would just have to turn right at this next intersection...and then continue along for another three or four minutes. "The place I'm headed is only up this street," she stated after turning the corner. Her feet were still sore, but once they got there she would be able to take a break and put her feet on the cold floor of her bathroom, take a shower, and-

Wait.

Take a shower? She would have a stranger in her house! Taking a shower in the presence of a stranger wasn't the brightest idea she'd ever had...but she could always lock the bathroom door, just to be safe...right?

[Guest]

"Milleise Notbeka?" Zairen said softly between breaths. He repeated it like a broken CD in his head, trying to memorize it for safe-keeping. He had a feeling he would need it later. Not only that, but...there was something else. Just something about the whole situation that made him want to stay with her. For now, he wasn't going to leave her side. Maybe it was the loyal wolf inside of him demanding to repay her for saving his life, although there was no confirmation that he would have actually died. Zairen played with his disease like this very often and never had he really come close to death; it just fooled around with his consciousness. She probably really thought he was dying. And she was the type of person that couldn't just turn a blind eye. Zai respected that, but he also wanted her to understand that this really...wasn't what it looked like. Maybe in the morning she would find out... After he took advantage of her. ...And her bread supply.

Okay maybe not exactly that. His wording was off. He really just needed a place to crash and recover from this episode. Then maybe he could take her as a gift to the emperor. If the kid was still alive. Zairen really hoped he wasn't. Just kidding! Well, he needed to collect data on Amestrians for the info-obsessed idiot. And this blue-haired one was an Amestrian, right? And she had a famous face, so she had to know some things that Ace Aeries could use. Zairen ran a pale hand through sweaty purple bangs and basked in the air conditioning. As he was drifting off, he felt the car start to slow down. He raised his head quickly and slammed it into the window like a confused dog. "Icchh," he hissed, rubbing it. "Is this where you live, Millie?"

It didn't look like a mansion like he expected. Amestris was making him somewhat disappointed. And Ace wouldn't stop dragging him around places and to...festivals that blew up. Alchemy was a sin...sort of. If he believed in any religion it would be a sin. It was more like...just cruel, though he was kind of made from alchemy... There were no apparent changes other than in his reactions to things and the lovely set of fangs that impeded his chewing (because he would always bite his tongue by accident). He eventually got used to it, but he could never help remembering what it was like to be a human. The slow movements... the regressed thinking, among other annoying things. That was why he had nearly died before... But humans were cruel, heartless things. Ace wasn't heartless...since he was the one who saved him from hell, but it was humans that pushed him into it. Zairen never wanted to see another cage again... He grew up behind bars, and well... it was different now. Milleise Notbeka wasn't cruel. She proved that, and thus Zairen approved of her company. She wasn't dull either... though her apartment spoke otherwise.

He felt sick, and winced at the thought of walking, but he was sure he could do it... "My name...is Zairen, Zairen Moccau. I work...for the Xingese government...in foreign affairs." He got out of the car with visible effort, stumbling to the side. No, he would not admit weakness nor put it on display for her. He absolutely refused to do so. He had looked pathetic enough in front of her. He forced himself to stand up straight and gave a fake, teethy smile, fangs showing. "I...sincerely thank you for your assistance..." His struggle wasn't obvious or anything. The strain in his voice was a clear enough indicator as for the sweat slipping down the sides of his face. He was going to pass out.

[Guest]

After another minute or two of driving down the quiet street, the girl turned the car into the driveway of a nice little house. Okay, maybe not that little, but it wasn't the mansion one would expect someone in her career field to have. In fact, it wasn't even a house, really. It was an apartment. She just liked to be reminded of the fact that she was a normal person, too. After all, it was tiring to act superior around people who just happened to love the bread that her face was plastered on, so it was nice to have a bit of normalcy in her life. Not to mention most of her neighbors were a bit older, and as such didn't care to take notice of the fact that her face really was plastered onto every single loaf of that particular brand of bread.

Once the car stopped, the man in the passenger seat sat up quickly, hitting his head against the window. Millie sighed, relieved that he wasn't dead. What would she have done if someone as gorgeous as him had died, and before she even had a chance to get to know him? Not wanting to give it any thought, she shook her head and didn't make any notable response to the fact that he had hit his face against the glass. It wasn't something that happened everyday, but she was just glad that he was still conscious. "Yeah, this is my place...it's not that big, but I like it just the way it is," the girl said as she started to blush. The last time anyone had called her Millie was back in Drachma, when her brother teased her about becoming an actress. Most people either called her "Blue" (because of her hair) or "bread girl".

As she got out of the car and began to walk toward the front of the vehicle, she stopped after Zairen had introduced himself (to the best of his ability). Xingese! He worked for the Xingese government! Well, in foreign affairs, sure, but still! Millie hadn't expected something as big as THIS! She stood in awe for a moment and looked at him, but noticed that he was still sweating and sounded out of breath. Barefoot and still in her skirt, she made her way over to him and gently touched his arm with one hand and made an attempt to hold him steady with the other, temporarily ignoring his thanks. "Don't pass out on me, Zairen. It's not that far...just a little more and you can pass out on the couch. Just don't make me carry you, I'm not that strong, you know." She didn't want to sound like an uncaring person, she just felt that maybe lightening the mood might help. Her eyes were still swollen, but she gave him a stern look.

Putting a hand on his back, she urged him to move forward toward the entrance. There were no lights on in the building other than at the door and the main hall. Luckily she was on the first floor, so they really didn't have too far to walk. She tried to push back the tears that were beginning to swell up in her eyes, but she couldn't avoid sniffling. She could tell that he needed to rest right now, but this wasn't a place to be unconscious. Heck, an apartment wasn't the first place that came to mind when she thought of the best place for him to be, but he didn't want to go to a hospital. He said there was a reason, but it still didn't feel right to her. That, and the gravel was hurting her already wounded feet. Millie winced with each step toward the door, all the while pushing Zairen gently forward and trying to keep herself from crying.

[Guest]

Despite Zairen's state of weakness, his mind was more aware of the things happening around him. However cloudy they were, he saw everything. He saw the low-hanging moon, the breaking of stars as the clouds parted, the bare footfall just beside him slapping painfully to the ground. A thought occurred to him then. As he tried to maintain consciousness, he vaguely thought that it should be the other way around. He should be carrying her. He heard her sniffing, he smelled the sent of her salty tears mixed with the taste of flames that had nearly taken their lives. This was too much for her. She wasn't used to the normal chaos of war like him... This was Central City, Amestris...it was peaceful for the most part. Zairen shut his eyes with a agonizing sigh. His lungs rejected the air and thrust black dots into his vision. No! he demanded as they reached the door and she unlocked it. It opened, revealing new smells.

This was Millie.

It was comforting and he already felt the exhaustion taking over him as he stepped onto the soft carpet. Throwing off his shoes, he found the nearest couch and fell onto it, pulling the girl close. "Just promise me..." he took a breath, "you won't cry too much..." He touched her cheek with a cold hand and smiled just slightly, steely blue eyes locked onto her. "Even if I'm snoring, I'm still watching, get it?" And with that, he let go of her and rolled over, shutting his eyes, and instantly sinking into sweet darkness.

* * *

The dawn cracked. No cocks crowed, but he knew. Instincts irked him awake. Groggily, he rose and stretched in the rays of bright light. It caressed long violet locks with warm affection, bringing the chimera's attention to his horrifyingly disheveled appearance. What a disgrace. He took off his black trench coat with the jagged white triangles lining the bottom and tossed it onto the couch. He straighted his black muscle shirt, that obviously revealed the thick muscles of his shoulders and forearms. His black jeans were already somewhat unwrinkled and decent enough. His hair... He took out the side ponytail that had been wrecked in his sleep and tossed the silky strands to his back. That would do for now...

With his wolfy hearing, he discerned that the blue-haired, bread-faced girl was still fast asleep. Briefly, he wondered how much she had cried... He would have to remedy that this morning. Why, he didn't know. Something akin to fate had landed them in this situation... Zairen only had the choice of acting how he should and so... he would make breakfast! Now, Zairen hated cooking. Of course, it involved work. He didn't have his cellphone or permission to use her land line, therefore, he hadn't a choice. He was starving; he would die waiting for her to wake up. And only when he was about to die could he partake in actually doing something even slightly related to cooking. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, doing dishes...were all hell. It was hell--simply hell! He shook off the shiver resting on his spine and wandered around until he found the kitchen. He was relying more on his sense of smell than anything else. Her kitchen smelled like butter, cinnamon, and fresh bread. What a perfect mixture...if only it didn't involve making it. He muttered under his breath in Xingese as he went about collecting all the items he needed. This included the loaf of bread with her face plastered on it. Just who...would buy the kind of bread with their own face on it? It was kind of cute actually... In fact the way everything was organized in a messy sort of way was somewhat reassuring... Not everyone was stuck up and rigid, even the famous ones.

He toasted the bread, bathed it in cinnamon, cooked eggs, bathed them in salt, and made two glorious plates of them. This...this was the only thing Zairen knew how to make. And he made it to perfection. His ears perked as he heard someone stir in the other room and turned to face the faint noise, holding the two plates. Where the hell was the kitchen table anyway?

[Guest]

It took a few minutes, but they were finally able to reach her apartment. After he had kicked off his shoes, Millie walked him over to the couch, on which he let himself fall, but not without pulling her in close. She blushed as he stared at her, but she didn't make any attempt to hide it. She didn't feel that it was necessary anymore. There was something about him that made her think he would notice just about everything, so she didn't care to hide anything at all anymore. Though...the fact that they were so close was a little...

"Just promise me...you won't cry too much..."

Milleise felt her heart skip a beat, and his hand touched her cheek. It was cold, like his eyes. Somehow, though, the coldness of his gaze felt quite warm to the girl, and she paused. She did not move. Not even when he turned the other way and fell asleep. The girl remained in that position for another 10 minutes before getting up and limping to her room, face red and hot from the contact and the closeness of Zairen. Ignoring the small specks of blood that she left on the carpet from her raw, sore feet, she hobbled to her bed and sat down. She put a hand to her chest. Her heart was beating a mile a minute.

'Am I... am i falling for him?' she thought, as she remained motionless on her bed. She stayed that way for ten minutes before she felt herself begin to tremble, and grabbed the brown bear that sat on her pillow, hugging it tightly. She tried to push back a sob, but it didn't work. "I can't...I can't promise that...Zairen..." she said, not knowing if he could hear her or not. That night, that very night, Milleise Notbeka had cried herself to sleep, Zairen's smell still fresh in her mind.

* * *

Food.

Milleise could smell food.

The girl slowly opened her eyes and squinted at the sunlight shining through her window. She could smell something that was akin to breakfast, just like her usual mornings. Something was different, though...

Well, duh.

She wasn't the one in the kitchen fixing breakfast. Taking a moment to sit up, she frowned at how heavy her eyelids felt and how sore her feet still were. Wondering what time it was, she sat up and moved over to the mirror that hung on her bedroom wall. Her eyes were only slightly red, but they were swollen. She couldn't remember how long she had cried before falling asleep, but it obviously wasn't a matter of mere minutes. She rubbed eyes and picked the bear up (it was roughly the size of her torso) before walking out of her room. The smell magnified, and she could see someone with long, purple hair holding two plates of food. There was toast, with cinnamon, and eggs.

Looking at Zairen, she walked over to him, half-awake, and dropped the bear before hugging him without any prior warning. She stayed like that for a moment before speaking, but kept her arms around him and her face in his torso. He really did smell nice, even if there was the scent of smoke still clinging to the two of them.

"Good morning, Zairen..." the girl muttered, taking in the heat from his body. She had slept without covers on, and her entire body felt as if it had been chilled. After all, a skirt and a small top couldn't be considered ample protection against the cool temperatures of the night, and her body was trembling slightly. He was warm. He smelled nice. He was different. He was here, in her apartment. He made breakfast.

The list went on.

[Guest]

Honestly, Zairen was surprised at any close contact not first initiated by himself. He almost dropped the plates, but managed to deposit them on the counter as the bread-face girl reeking of tears collided with him and disappeared into his chest. He felt her chilled skin brush against his--he felt each intake of her breath and the trembling that was not only in body, but in soul as well. Slowly, cautiously, he found himself wrapping his arms around her slender form. Icy eyes slid shut and he took in a deep, even breath, fear curling dusty fingers around his heart. But he already knew it was too late. He knew how much more pain it would cause if he turned away from it. In his life, Zairen had witnessed so many agonizing results of people's actions; he had learned what not to do when faced with the fragile emotions of someone that cared about someone else. He felt it, no, more so the sensitive wolf in him was able to pick it up and just knew. Chills wracked his body and the parts of him that touched her crawled like it had the first time he had ever felt someone's skin meet his. Yairen... He hadn't dreamed of those old memories in so long... Those times before he was free--when he had only the ticking clock for company. Now... He jolted back to the present and instantly let go of her, stepping away briskly. A look of sheer horror entered into his blue eyes when they snapped open, and then went away. He had been lost for a moment...for just a moment.

Long purple hair slithered down each shoulder in disarray, his eyes still wide with something akin to a bird in flight. "Good morning," he said with a worried smile. Leave it to fate. He motioned to the plates. "Take your pick. You came just in time. Why not eat and then take a shower to warm yourself up?" Without realizing it until now, he had been protecting her. So she was important? Had she become something important? Why was he here? He would have been fine spending the night in the middle of the parking lot. What had compelled him to do this... Why did he bother cooking? Questions which had been silent until this moment, piled up and began to overflow his buzzing mind. She hugged him. Why? He inwardly shuddered and crossed his arms around his center absentmindedly. No, he knew at all the answers.

With a bittersweet smile, he turned to the pan and began scrubbing it in the sink. He hated washing dishes. He was going to ask her if she minded doing them, but...he needed a distraction now. He had to accept these shadows of feelings...because they were the first things he had felt in years. It was like the first time he had ever touched the grass... after he had been shot. That painful bliss... He didn't know how to handle it. All he knew was that he wanted her to come with him. He had to leave, but...he wanted Millie to come with him.

[Guest]

It was as though something was...off, for lack of a better term. Something was off. The fact that he was still here, even though he didn't have to be, was something that the girl hadn't expected. It wasn't necessarily bad, but it was definitely, definitely, different. In fact, it was actually quite comforting to know that there was someone who actually seemed to care about her as a person rather than just a money-making machine. That alone wasn't something that she was used to at all. The girl was used to being cared for only if it would affect her ability to work. She knew it was wrong, but a job was a job. Taking in a deep breath, she calmed herself down...somewehat. He was so warm, and it felt good to be held. Zairen Moccau. That was a name she knew she would never forget.

Milleise rubbed her eyes as Zairen stepped away, so she didn't quite notice his sudden change in expression, which was gone as quickly as it had come about. She didn't really want to let go - or for him to let go - but she realized that there was still food on the counter. That, and the moment had been getting a little too intense for the time being. Even if she had enjoyed it, it wasn't necessarily the most fitting situation right now. Picking the bear back up from where she had dropped it, she looked at Zairen. He greeted her as was proper for the time of day, and gestured to the plates, instructing her to grab one. Then he suggested she take a shower after eating. Yeah, she definitely needed one, which made her giggle slightly. Maybe the smell was overpowering for a chimera.

"I... A shower would be nice," the girl said as she picked up a plate and sat down. Her green eyes followed Zairen's movements as he first crossed his arms and then proceeded to scrub the pan. Her mouth slowly shifted into a smile, and she kept her gaze focused on him as she ate, completely oblivious to the flavors present in her food. She was too absorbed in the fact that this man was here, and it felt as though he knew that she was troubled by what had happened and... he was supportive. Without him, who knows what might have happened to her? After all, she didn't react well when she panicked, but with him around, she had managed to get them both out of harm's way. Picking up her toast, she looked at it with disdain and cradled her chin in her hand, placing her elbow on the table with a sigh. It was the same bread she always bought, and it really was her favorite, but it was the bread with her own face on it, and that alone reminded her of how much she hated the people around her. She enjoyed her job, and it was nice when people recognized her and sometimes even wanted autographs, but that was the only thing keeping her from quitting, even with the nice paycheck she was getting. She clutched the bear tightly as she looked at the man that she felt such a strong attraction to. Her emerald eyes were filled with a mix of emotions: confusion, anger, longing, and something short of a cry for help.

"Hey, Zairen...mind if I...tag along with you today?"

[Guest]

"That depends..." Zairen said, raising a pair of steel blue eyes and fixing them on her. He let no emotion escape him save for the fact that he was deep in thought over relatively the same question he was about to ask her. The problem was that he didn't know the answer himself. "Are you planning to make it a habit?" Let go now if you are planning to let go. Just how long...would this last? He had never made breakfast for anyone in his life. He had never opted to wash dishes without being forced to... Zairen Moccau wasn't being himself. And it was her fault--her and her spontaneous, unexpected hug that told him more than her ever needed to know. The chimera's breath hitched in his lungs and he almost dropped the soapy bowl. Instead, he let it clatter unceremoniously into the metal sink and coughed as discreetly as he could into his hand. Warm water dripped down his elbow and made him shudder as it grew cold in the open air. His eyes flickered from the mess in the sink to Millie's sweet eyes and he frowned. There was nothing he could do to avoid this. God, his chest hurt. "As I've told you before, I am from Xing. Amestris is not my country. If you choose to follow me even if it's just for today...you may need your passport." His expression was hard, cold, and extremely serious. "This isn't a game, Millie," he smiled slightly and patted the top of her head with his wet hand and the fondest expression that ever slipped onto his face. "It may be better if you don't get involved for your sake...I--I can be killed at anytime and--but...argh!" He pressed his hands over his face and let his frustration be known.

This was more than he could take.

"I'd rather keep you with me. Is that so selfish?" Forget the dishes. He hopped up onto the counter, refusing to make eye contact with her as he proceeded to down his own meal. If he left her now, would it hurt her less? Could he sidestep his own selfishness and the longing for someone to be close? He clenched his fist behind him until his knuckles turned white. What was this exactly? He could neither confirm anything nor write it off. He felt dizzy and as if his mind was breaking down. Did he still have a fever? He shut his eyes in concentration. He had to leave, but it would be better for her if she didn't come. What he wanted...didn't matter. When he was killed in battle, she would cry harder then if he walked out the door right now. Preemptive pain...preemptive. Was that really how life should be? Now that he had the power to change a person's fate, he had no idea what to do with it. This was the best way, right?

He would leave. When she went into the shower, Zairen Moccau would disappear.

[Guest]

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