BARBERSHOP BRUNCH, BRO'S.

[Wolfgang Murinyo]

Date: September 17^th, 2013
Time: 7:43 PM, CDT (Ciel Dominion Time)
Location: Mt. Jillaine, Gelemorté; Conference Room One-Alpha-Flapjacks, Fort Rose

There are many things that people simply just don't understand about Gelemorté, or the state of affairs within, or the laws that comprise such a great and wonderful nation, or even the ever-changing design of its main military Headquarters. And Fort Rose changed; A LOT. Over the years of the Ciel Dominion's existence, many modifications have been made to Fort Rose, which was originally a log cabin in the mountains. Said cabin still exists, in fact, at the heart of the facility, but rooms were built around it; elevators installed, escalators put in place, even a zip-line, for God knows what reasoning, and it was always amended by the current Head of Infantry.

Back in Regy's days, he'd had every mirror in the entire facility destroyed, and he added a wine cellar. Vijaya had, in a moment of glorious mayhem, remodeled all of the doors to accommodate her 7'5" height, with a sledgehammer. And, for whatever reasons, though likely the fact he'd only been in office for a few months, the only Head during Wolfy's reign to NOT edit the Fort- yet- had been Vincent Richelieu.

That said, Wolfy himself did quite a bit of remodeling. And he did such frequently Indeed, he really was a bit of an interior decorator, at his heart of hearts. He was always a great party host. Which brings us to the evening's events.

Wolfy sat, wearing a Spiderman costume, in the driver's side back seat of a garishly green 1976 Cadillac, coated in glitter, with the most jacked up rims and tires you've ever been privy to see. It was a wonder how it could fit inside the bui-... How did he get it inside in the first place...? As it happened, the car had been built in that room. It was THAT important.

And what room was it, you may be asking? Why, it was Conference Room One-Alpha-Flapjacks. Otherwise known as the first conference room of Fort Rose, with the Flapjacks portion being added in SPECIFICALLY for the evening's events. It was indeed a part of the original Fort Rose, with wooden walls and such and that good old musky smell of a log cabin. Lanterns lit the room, and the only signs of modern technology were the windows. Namely because, THROUGH the windows, one could see the REST of Fort Rose, or at least, the hallways and cubicles outside the conference room.

Now. Exactly why was Wolfy here? Well, he'd called for his most important members of staff to come to a meeting. It was partially to discuss Deadlight, partially to discuss politics, partially to discuss Gelemorté as a whole, and partially to enjoy brunch.

At seven in the evening.

And did I forget to mention the decor of the room?

Disregarding the Cadillac and the meeting table and chairs, the room was decorated very much like a barbershop, with the red and white swirling things, a "waiting room" in one corner, and in the other half of the room, there were two large mirrors and several chairs for one to get a haircut. Manned by real barbers hired to stand there. And the corny signs littering the place... Most were from the fifties, and included license plates, funny banners, a sign declaring a five cent fee for whining, and exactly five vaguely promiscuous pictures of cartoon women such as Betty Boop and Jessica Rabbit. It was very much a reconstruction of every single oldschool barbershop in existence. It took days to complete. The original Head of Infantry would have probably cried after seeing his hand-built Fort desecrated so. But it was for a good cause.

Anywho, he'd invited exactly three men to such an event, and had given every militant stationed at Fort Rose a day off, bar one. That would be the Head of Fort Rose himself, Vincent Richelieu.He was somewhat new, and as mentioned, had yet to make any major changes to the Fort. Though there were a lot more roses everywhere, making Fort Rose much more lively and to-the-name, as well as his updating of every computer at the Fort to the utmost technological superiority. But, alas, nothing on the lines of taking a sledgehammer to the place...

The second man invited was Wolfy's Head of the Dragonriders, also called the Airforce of Gelemorté, or even more accurately, the Scareforce. Because the guy in charge was almost as any as Wolfy himself. Alder Finch had been Head of the Dragonriders for quite some time, perhaps a few months to a year longer than Vincent had taken his post, though Wolfy couldn't be too sure. As it was, he was very important to some planning of Wolfy's, and of course, he'd make for great brunch conversation.

And last, but most definitely not least, he'd invited his General de Gelemorté, Bronze Degan, to such a meeting. As Wolfy's top lieutenant, his second in command, his wingman and all-around bro, Bronze would of course be invited. Plus, after all that World War III stuff, and Wolfy possibly traumatizing the poor guy during the surprise Trials of Stardom, he felt he should make it up to his General. Plus, he was an important guy, and deserved to have a say in some of the events of the meeting. He was also a cool dude. Cool dudes should attend brunch.

Speaking of said brunch, Wolfy had carefully arranged the menu! He felt it was very fitting. Grapefruit, scones, bacon, crapes, croissants, sandwiches, rouenian toast, liver pudding, cheeseburgers, Skittles, bagels, and the most important thing of all; LOTS OF BOOZE. Why would there be drinking at an important meeting? BECAUSE WHY NOT, LOL? And indeed, there was a bartender on hand for any sort of drink one would need, and waiting staff on hand to set the table. Now all he had to do was wait for his guests to arrive. THIS SHOULD BE SO MUCH FUN. And uh... Y'know, the international crisis solution-finding too...

[Alder Finch]

"Dragonrider Commander reporting for duty!" A Mr Alder Finch proclaimed to no one in particular as he treaversed the hallways of Fort Rose. So this fancy place was where Mr Fancipants Vincent worked at? No, commanded? Yes, that guy from that bar that time. The one that had gotten so upset when some child was hit in the face with a waffle. Please, Alder had only wished that it had been himself. Anyway, here at the fort there were, surprisingly, roses everywhere. With a name like Fort Rose, Alder could only assume the place would be covered in Tulips or Hydrangeas or something. But roses? Why roses? That made absolutely no sense at all.
 
The pilot strolled down the hallways quickly, smirking at random people and winking at others. Made no difference to him if they were male or female, he was taken anyway. Speaking of which, he should probably not encourage the random strangers. They didn't seem to be paying him much attention anyway, they just vaguely concerned at the fact that a grown man was waltzing through the hallways dressed in what appeared to be a superhero outfit, cape and all. He'd even gone as far as to wear tights and style his hair in a certain way. Of course, this was Gelemorté though. These people probably expected anything, given the sanity levels (or lack thereof) of their king. Speaking of which, Alder was still in search of that meeting room.
 
Such room appeared before him in the form of a log cabin. How interesting it was, to come across such structure in the middle of Fort Rose. With cubicles and other high-tech gadgets around, the meeting room seemed to stand out. This is exactly why it was so easy for Alder to locate it. Now, he could have knocked like a civilized man. He could have opened the door and walked in. Perhaps he could have even waited for another person before walking in with them. Alder chose none of these options. No, he didn't kick the door in like some people would, he instead walked away. Yep, he just walked away. That was it? No, of course not! The crazed pilot turned upon his heel and ran, yes ran, down the hallway. Cape billowing behind him, eyes set in determination, Alder didn't even hesitate when he reached an open window along the wall of the room and dove straight into the room, rolling as he hit the floor. This took the man straight to a barber's chair, where he promptly stood as if jumping through windows was completely normal, and plopped into a chair in front of one of the conveniently stationed barbers. "You know, I do need a haircut." He voiced, twirling a strand of hair around his finger. "Not too much though, just take off like the dead-ends or something. Oh and I'll be needing a shave as well." He explained, rubbing his hand along his jaw, which was barren of hair.  
 

Only at that moment did Alder notice the Cadillac parked within the room. How odd, but so perfect. Rooms like this were made for Cadillacs! Or maybe Cadillacs were made for this room. It didn't matter. Noticing at last that this car had to be where the king was currently placed, Alder jumped from the chair, nearly getting his ear sliced off with scissors as he jumped up. The haircut could wait. There were more pressing matters to attend to! Grinning, Alder ran once more and leaped straight through the window of the car. He obviously didn't think that through - when does the blond ever think things through? - as he ended up flying into the other door. He'd probably have a bruise there the next day, but didn't matter. What did matter though - "Copy cat!" Alder pouted, pointing to Wolfy's suit in resentment. "I was wearing my super hero costume today!" Alder sighed irritably before continuing. "Right, of course. More pressing matters, yes? So, if someone wants to adopt a child in this country what would they have to do? Can I get some papers for that? Ah, right, right! Deadlight. Virus. Dying. Relief efforts." He nodded, trying to appear serious as he leaned back in the car's seat and crossed his arms behind his head. "We should probably talk about that." Alder then waved his hand at the uniforms that he and Wolfy both adorned. "Oh, and discuss our outfit schedules, this is embarrassing."

[Vincent Richelieu]

Vincent adjusted his hair once more in the mirror, making sure it was perfect, before he saw the time. He was already five minutes late! "Ah! Damn it!" he exclaimed frustrated, nearly knocking his mirror over shooting up from his chair. Hurriedly, rushed out of the room into the labyrinth of hallways dubbed as Fort Rose.


He started navigating the halls quickly, taking note of how boring they were. He hadn't had much time to beautify the fort since he's been there due to his first mission there. The technology was extremely out dated, as if the previous owner was a cave man or something! So he had spent weeks updating every single bit of technology in the establishment to the newest and best version it could be. The only thing he had time to do before the outbreak of the Deadlight Virus was fill Fort Rose with roses. When he got there, there were hardly any roses to be seen. Why call the place Fort Rose then? So basically, he only had time to take care of the essentials. The next thing on his list of things to do to beautify the fort to be fitting of such an amazing leader such as himself, was to do something about the drab and boring grey walls. Perhaps he would paint them all black and install blue neon into them. After all, he had money to spare. Unfortunately, he would probably be pretty busy with no time to do so. So he'd have to deal with the boringness a little while longer.


Eventually he reached the center of Fort Rose. The one place he wouldn't end up changing. It was the cabin; the original Fort Rose. Hesitantly, he opened the door, afraid he'd get a scolding for being late. He'd never been late to a summon by the King before, so he wasn't sure how he'd react! He took a moment to smooth out his very expensive black suit and adjust his electric blue tie. This outfit took hours to pick out as he had to try to find the perfect outfit for this particular meeting. After he finally picked it out, the last two hours were dedicated to fixing his hair to make it perfect. Combing it, adding products to make it smooth and soft. Then placing it just right to frame his most fabulous face and cover up that pesky mole. That was the reason why he was so late for this meeting now! With an unsteady breath he opened the door.


Once he opened the door, his nervousness wore off and confusion seeped in. The room was decorated like a barbershop. Why? Why a barbershop? Maybe one day he would realize that he should just stop asking questions. The room was quite whimsical and old fashioned. It was pretty pleasing to the eye. Especially since there were several mirrors that he could see himself in. And of course, any room with him in it was beautiful to a degree! So a room with himself and several reflections of him would be much more beautiful!


Unfortunately the beauty of the room decreased significantly once he noticed Commander of the Dragonriders was there before him, dressed in a very silly outfit conversing with the King (who was wearing a similarly ridiculous outfit). Jealousy crept up his spine at the site. Why was the King conversing with someone less worthy? "Because you were late and he was on time, you idiot! Now the King likes him more than you! You can't stand for that! You're much more worthy of the King's time! The attention should be on you!" Too irritated to even mentally question the purpose of the Cadillac, Vincent very gracefully-for someone under so much stress-strolled over to where the other two were.


"Your Majesty, I have arrived. Terribly sorry for being late. My apologies." He said with a quick bow. He was always very formal with Wolfgang. He knew his place unlike certain other people. Vincent silently seethed to himself about the situation as he took his seat and poured himself a generous glass of expensive red wine.

[Wolfgang Murinyo]

It most certainly didn't surprise the mad king of Gelemorte that Alder Finch, THE Alder Finch, king of the Scareforce, would arrive in such a ridiculous manner. It was almost as if Wolfy had dared him to do so, dared him to dive in through the window. He'd left that window open for a reason, bwahaha! And it certainly served its purpose well. Wolfy didn't open the Cadillac door, however, deciding Alder should find this for himself. He was a good boy, he could do it! And then he decided to get a trim, rather than noticing the blatantly obvious Cadillac in the room. I mean really, it's almost literally a pink elephant in the middle of the room!

But of course, Alder noticed the Caddy as the barber prepared to cut his hair, narrowly avoiding Alder's ear as the wild-eyed pilot dove at the Cadillac with reckless abandon. Of course, Alder probably intended to hug Wolfy in a flying tackle glomp, but Wolfy casually continued sitting in the back seat, sipping at a juice box. Blurpleberry, of course, because things didn't have to actually exist for Wolfy to enjoy them. The main question, however, was how he was sipping juice through a Spiderman mask. It made very little sense, yet here he was, doing exactly that, as he watched Alder tumble into the passenger's seat, possibly breaking his neck. "I weres expectin' ya. THOUGHT YOUSE COULD GLOMP MEH, EH!? NOOOOOOWAI, HOMBRE. I'MA GLOMP YOU, 'STEADS. EIGHT DEE." Yes, he added 8D to the end of his sentence, verbally, as he flung himself from the backseat, tackling Alder and spraying him with silly stri- erm... Spider webs. Yeah.

Moments later, Alder then accused him of stealing the superhero idea. "WAT... Kay, maybe I stealed it from ya. Iunno. MAYBE YOUSE TOOK IT FROM ME!? Iunno. POINT BEIN', forty-two, because ice cream ain't gots no bones." Very matter-of-factly spoken, indeed, with a sagely nod. Alder then went on, probably taking that advice to heart, and spoke of more pressing matters. LIKE CHILD ADOPTION. "You'll needa gives me somethin' ta PERSUADE me. Like a chupacabra! Or a cuppa coffee. One'a dems. AS FAR AS DEADLIGHT GOES, let's wait for the other guests to arri-" And, just on cue, there was Vincent.

Wolfy flung himself, LITERALLY THROUGH, the window immediately to his lift, running at Vincent in slow motion. "VIIIIIIIINCEEEEEENT!~" YES. ALL OF THE VINCENT. But of course, Vincent being the classy mofo he is, he sat down and poured some wine, INDIRECTLY CAUSING WOLFY TO TRIP OVER A POORLY PLACED GARDEN ORB. Someone really had to make Gelemorte make more sense. This is clearly getting ridiculous! Wolfy stood up from his landing place, and took a seat at the table as well, pouring hi juice box into another, slightly nicer, juice-box. "Mentlegen. We'ze is one man 'way from gettin' ta talkin' 'bout stuff!~" Until then? PARTY TIIIIIIIIME.

(~(Skipping Bronze, per his request)~)

[Alder Finch]

Alder squeaked, yes, he squeaked, at the sudden glomp. Out of everything there, that had been the most unexpected. The bar, the barbers, and the Cadillac had all been totally expected. But the hug tackle thing was totally UNEXPECTED. Why? Because reasons. The spider webs were also very spiderwebby. In a silly string way. Alder could have assumed that Wolfy had hid a can of silly string somewhere, but instead chose to believe that Wolfy was a special type of spiderman that shot silly string instead of webs. Because things totally worked like that.

Wolfy could have played dumb, but Alder knew the truth. Wolfy had totally stolen the idea of super hero outfits from him. Alder simply huffed and crossed his arms in annoyance, that is, before the king continued speaking. "Oh! Really? Awesome! Where can I find this Chupacabra? Oh, what if I get you a chupacabra holding a cup of coffee? That'd enable me to adopt like, ALL of the children right? Goody!" Alder grinned, a bright beam of excitement. This meeting had nothing to do with child adoption though. It had more important matters, though Alder really couldn't recall what it was. Until of course, Mr Fancy Pants strolled into the area.

Alder leaned out the window of the Cadillac to see the fanciful blonde man come strolling into the place. Laaaaaatteeee. Shaaaammee. Alder wasn't sure that there was ever even a specific time frame that they had to arrive at, but if there was Vincent would definitely be late. He just strolled in and poured himself some wine. Alder had somehow completely missed that section of the party. How in the world had he not seen the booze?

Opening the door, like a civilized person, Alder jumped from the car and sprinted the few feet over to the table, half-glomping Vincent in the process. He flew into Vincent's back and draped an arm across the man's shoulder's, leaning over him to snatch up the fancy bottle of wine before standing properly again. "Whatcha drinkin' here, Fancy Boy?" Alder read the label, or attempted to read the fancy swirly letters, before placing it back on the table. He didn't need the fancy crap. Alder strolled casually to the bartender nearby and leaned against the bar, smiling in a charming way. "Give me one of every drink you have, mixed together, in a gallon pitcher." Alder then plopped himself down on a bar stool. "Oh and I want a lime wedge on that as well."

[Vincent Richelieu]

Shortly after he sat down, Wolfy had started running at him calling his name only to trip over a garden orb. How had he not noticed the garden orb before? Vincent scoffed to himself. Everything was so ridiculous here. So ridiculous…The places, the people, even the king! Especially the king! Vincent started to worry that this conversation wouldn’t get the seriousness and respect that it deserved. How could they be so cheerful and happy when something so terrible was going on? Especially when they were about to discuss what they were going to do about it. Perhaps it was their way of coping and keeping their mind off of things. Whatever it was, Vincent certainly hoped things would get serious, but for now, he would wait.

After seeing the king fumble and fall to the ground and just get up like it was no big deal and sat down at a seat at the table, Vincent swirled his wine in his glass, still quite jealous. “At least he didn’t sit next to that…that…I won’t even think his name!”  As if on cue, said annoyance rammed right into his back, causing his wine to spill. Luckily it didn’t end up on his suit; it just ended up falling on the table in front of him. With a growl, he reached for a napkin, but before he could, an arm was draped around him and said arm snatched up the bottle of wine from in front of him. The nerve! How dare he touch the amazing Vincent Richelieu?! And then have the nerve to snatch up his wine! Pugh! So ungentlemanly! And of course! Calling him “Fancy Boy” still! The nickname from that waffle house had most certainly stuck and every time they interacted, that was the name he was called. “If you MUST know, it is Henri Jayer Richebourg Grand Cru, Cote de Nuits. You’ve probably never had it before. It is one of the most expensive wines in the world. Very high quality.” Vincent replied with a quite perturbed undertone before muttering under his breath “Probably too high quality for the likes of you.” With that the other man had slammed the bottle back on the table, causing yet another vibration and Vincent’s wine spilt once again. He growled to himself and as he heard the very unsophisticated order, he muttered “Called it.”

Vincent refilled his glass and sipped it carefully. He would have to limit himself. He didn’t want to be intoxicated during such a meeting. Looking up at the giant grand buffet of food in front of him, he realized that he had spent the last few hours since lunch on his appearance and had forgotten to eat anything as made apparent by the growling of his stomach. Taking a gander at the food available, he found he wasn’t really in the mood for breakfast food and that was all that was available. Wait! No! Vincent spied a rather unsophisticated food but it was non breakfast. A cheeseburger. His guilty pleasure. Many a times he would sneak away in some sort of disguise to go down to a local burger joint and buy one of the greasy piles of goodness. Unfortunately, he couldn’t don a disguise. If he ate one, everyone would know! Well, not everyone, just the most important people. The king was already upset with him about being late probably and already was giving that…fool more attention. What would he think if he was eating a cheeseburger? He stood staring at the food for a moment, contemplating. Everyone was really distracted. Perhaps they wouldn’t notice? Maybe they wouldn’t care?  He was probably worrying too much. That’s when he made his decision. He would eat that cheeseburger proudly like it was no big deal! People would be too distracted by his beauty to notice that he was eating such an unfabulous food. With that, he delicately placed one on his plate, along with a grapefruit before returning to his seat to properly enjoy it but not without his almost visible cloud of angst above his head as he was still very much upset about everything.

[Wolfgang Murinyo]

A chupacabra... With a cup of coffee? At the same time? Was such a thing even plausible? Could one obtain BOTH of these most difficult to acquire objects!? Wolfy took a sip of his mocha latte, which had been sitting on the floorboard of the car, until the exact moment he needed it. Hmmm... If only he had a cup of coffee to go with this latte... Or a chupacabra, for that matter. He'd name him Prince Chupa, and he would be Wolfy's Prince Chupa. He would also be the royal successor to the throne, despite Wolfy's brother Hagan, technically being next in line, and the existence of three potential heirs, all of the ORIGINAL royal bloodline. Psh. They could get over it. Prince Chupa would be the next king.

Wolfy glanced at Alder, before casually discarding his coffee, which had only been sipped at once. "Oyah. Fin' me both'a dem things'n youse kin do 'tevah ya wantin'a do. ALL da 'dopted kids! ALL'A DEMS." Of course, that was a horrible idea, entrusting Alder with even ONE child. He was insane, he'd make a terrible father! BUUUUUUUUT... A CHUPACABRA WITH A CUP OF COFFEE... It certainly said otherwise. But of course, Alder would have to travel to every corner of the Earth to obtain these precious things! And he certainly had no means of doing that; he'd have to have like, a plane or something. And a pilot's license. And enough madness to actually believe he could FIND a chupacabra, let alone the mythical coffee Wolfy sought after. Speaking of which, he picked up the cup he'd so lackadaisically flung behind him, taking another thoughtful sip before tossing it out through one of the windows of the log cabin, into the hallways. Some intern likely slipped on it, which was probably highly amusing, before said intern cleaned it up and earned a raise and a small promotion. Hurray, everybody wins!

Except the garden orb that Wolfy had tripped over. It most certainly didn't win. In fact, it fell over on its side, and was pronounced dead! Because one cannot simply stand it back up and carry on as if it never fell over. That would be silly and ridiculous. Instead, a pair of paramedics came in and examined the garden orb as Wolfy casually sat down to eat.

"...No...NOOOOOOOOO! ÉL ESTÁ MUERTOOOO!"
An obviously Esparian paramedic fell to his knees, crying this into the wind. Also, wind suddenly flowed through the open windows, despite the fact the log cabin was surrounded on all sides by building. An overly macho Amestrian paramedic slapped the Esparian.

"QUIET, FOOL. HASTA LA VISTA, BABY."
At that, he pulled the pin on a grenade and punched it through the garden orb, throwing it into the Cadillac. The grenade exploded, sending shards of garden orb glass pretty confetti into the air above the car. The Esparian sobbed, as the Amestrian dragged him out of the room.

Despite this odd exchange, Wolfy busied himself with piling flapjacks onto his plate, topping said pancakes with olives and gravy. It didn't actually ever cross his mind that none of these were actually at the buffet table before he obtained the food for himself, but then again, few things he did ever made sense. Regardless, he topped his toppings with copious amounts of sour tropical Skittles, which were originally in the buffet, oddly enough, and scooped a healthy handful of liver pudding onto his plate, next to his dozen or so pancakes. "MMM-MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmmmm, GOOD." Ignoring Alder and Vincent for the moment, as they exchanged witty banter, he stabbed his fork into his pancakes, shoveling it into his facial orifice. This was repeated several times until his plate was empty, and as Vincent and Alder concluded their FRIENDLY SESSION OF WINE-ENJOYING, he let fly a hazardously unkingly burp, echoing deeply for several seconds, before he dabbed at his mouth with a napkin, daintily stating, "Scusi."

But it was then, at that exact moment, that he saw what he really wanted. He eyed a cheeseburger across the buffet tables, and was about to reach for it, when Vincent took a careful and quick lunge for it, obviously trying to be discreet. Wolfy loudly gasped, pointing an accusing finger at Vincent, before pausing for a hesitant few moments.

"VINCENT! YOU!... YOU!..." He then laid his hand on Vincent's cheek. "Youse got vureh nice cheekbones, Vincent! JUST WANTIN'A COMPLIMENT'CHA." Yep. Didn't even care that Vincent had partaken in such a naughty guilty pleasure, the cheeseburger. Namely because Wolfy, a sagely man of wisdom, knew just how irresistible they were. No man was immune to a good cheeseburger, not even vegetarians. Vegetarians, in fact, are only jealous of those who can publicly eat cheeseburgers, because they all probably eat them in private, while denying it in public. Unlike Wolfy!

In fact, he reached over and grabbed four burgers and a fistful of bacon, even distributing the bacon on his burgers, as well as a bottle of maple syrup, which he poured onto the burgers. Many would say it destroyed the burger's integrity, KILLED it's very burgery-ness. But Wolfy was hungry for brunch. Burgers for lunch, bacon for breakfast. Bacon burgers for brunch! Delicious combination. And so he bit down into the first of the burgers, relishing the meaty taste and the sweetness of the syrup, alongside the crispness of the lettuce and the crunch of bacon. And the cheese! This burger, as not all were alike, had Cretan cheese, which was by far the best cheese. Made in WISCONSIN, no less! A part of Creta EXPLICITLY MADE for making cheese! Glorious.

Hmmm... Okay, so TWO of his people were here. And he was on his second plate. So it was clearly time to acknowledge the fact that his beloved General was simply not going to show up. LAAAAAAAAME. But no matter! Wolfy stood, at that point, addressing both Bronze and Vincent. "Okee-doke, then, m'bro's. Seems 'sif Bronzey's not gonna make it, soes I'ma s'pose we could just go 'head'n haves our meetin' 'thout him." Psh. He was missing out! On all the free booze! "So! Firs'n foremost, what's you two thinkin' 'bout the Deadlight pandemic? All yer concerns'n questions, let's start there." Right. Now was time to discuss Deadlight. SERIOUS MODE: ENGAGE.

...Despite the fact he was still dressed like Spiderman...

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